adjective
1. relating to or believing in a religion.
I do not believe in a "religion"
I believe in God and that Jesus is His son and that Jesus died on the cross for us.
Pretty cut and dry.
Of course, there is a lot more to that but the difference is that I have a "relationship" with God and Jesus.
Does that make me religious?
Maybe to some, as I have recently been referred to. I suppose it was bound to happen and honestly, was upset about the conversation, but once I explained some things, it was better understood that nope, I am actually not really "religious" (not that religious is a bad thing, it just is not me)
This all sounds negative and it is not my intention AT ALL. If anything, I want it to be positive, well maybe, clear is a better word.
I am human.
duh.
I have said it before and I will continue to say it. I have made some big mistakes, made some bad choices and some life changing decisions.
uggh.
The good news to
all of that junk above is that I have been forgiven by God. I have learned some amazing lessons and have chosen to
FINALLY forgive myself and recognise what I am:
(pssst.so are you). 
All of this has taken a long time for me to do and I was holding my own self hostage.
uggh.
Even though God had forgiven me long long ago, I had not forgiven myself and part of that was disguised as trying to be in CONTROL.
NOTE to self: I am not in control.
duh.
Either are you.
The ONLY thing I am in control of is how I choose to feel.
This leads to the next topic about me, my faith and the word control.
uggh.
If you think you are not a controlling person, that is probably part of the control.
uggh.
Through all the junk above, I thought I was in control when really, I simply had choices to make and unfortunately made poor ones. While some were poor and some were wrong they have lead me to right here, right now and because of my relationship and forgiveness, I am in a very good place.
(psst...GOD gives us the opportunity to make choices.)
We all have that option. The difference is the decisions you make.
Now, even though I have a strong and growing faith and relationship with God, again, I am human and I still make mistakes and poor choices. The difference now is when this happens, I recoginise the situation, figure out how to fix it, admit it and learn from it.
It seems that some think that because I doodle faith based quotes, add verses to my art and share my faith, that I am not going to stumble. oh friends....I am forever stumbling, sometimes all the way down a hill BUT I will be the first one to throw myself under the bus.
This leads to the final topic of this very informative blog post ( I am also a little sarcastic, duh.) which is my skills, talents and abilities which = art.
I have been creating things since the day I was born. Just ask my mom and dad.
The difference is that until I recognized that the things I created were a gift and not just a talent, all I did was play around and really did nothing with it. Others saw it, told me and tried to convince me but did I listen? Yes, I listened, but just kept doing my own thing.
One of the poor decisions (from above) was that I always took what I look at now as shortcuts through life (although at the time, I would not have said that)
Instead of going to college, I worked in an office, sitting behind a desk, probably doodling on notepads. While I do not have a framed document on my wall from a college, I did take college classes, in fact, LOTS of college class. Hey, I am a "beauty school dropout"....TWICE! I did take lots of art classes, but it was not natural for me. I did not do well with "assignments" and was better at just creating on my own.
uggh.
I even took an Accounting class, or two. (just ask my mom, we took it together) NOPE.
All that above was me trying to be in CONTROL. Fact is, again, I wasn't in control but you could not tell a twenty something that. (and I am now remembering all of this as a parent)
double uggh.
anyway...back to art..
I do not remember "the day" that everything changed for me with my creative arts because it has been a process and will continue to be.
I made the conscious decision to visibly share my faith through my art because of the simple fact.
It is my gift and because it is a gift, it is my responsibility to share it.
9 times out of 10, the things I post here, doodle on a Project Life card, or share on FB or Instgram are for me BUT I know that I am not alone in whatever it is I am creating about or dealing with and by sharing it publicly, it sometimes helps others.
THAT right there is part of my purpose and having a "purpose" is not about a religion or being "religious." It is about having a relationship.
I do not remember "the day" I decided to share my faith in my art but I do remember the day that I decided to "surrender all."
I remember the people that were sitting around the table and I do remember how it effected my art.
Is it religious art? No.
Is it faith-based art? Well, yes it is because it is my gift and it is my purpose to share, inspire and teach you and yes because it is based on my faith whether it has a quote on it or not.
Is all this easy for me to share?
Nope.
I often say having faith is easy, being brave is hard and here is a great example of that:
Thanks for hanging in there with me. Some may have already clicked off by now, but if you are still reading, I hope that you are understanding me. I will NEVER preach to you, ever. I will share with you what I have learned, what I have experienced and what I am continuing to learn, but just like you, I am a work in progress.
